Aug
12
2008
The reason is many adults who grew up in vulnerable alcoholic or abusive families did not get their needs for attunement, affection, positive regard, we could say…love met by these families.
As a result, these adults can spend their lifetime trying to replace that lost love by unhealthy attachments with other adults, and yes, even therapists.
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Jun
26
2008
Sorry. I know there are a lot of you out there who believe that your infant and early childhood years should not be that significant. “That was then and now is now!” right?
Well, for all you disbelievers, read on…
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Jun
25
2008
John Bowlby was the first clinician to identify the 3 stages of an infant’s or young child’s response to the separation and/or deprivation of a mother or other attachment figure.
Bowlby identified 3 stages in the infant/child response:
- Protest…the initial crying out in distress when the attachment figure is not available to help soothe the infant/child’s distress or as it is commonly termed, “separation anxiety.”
- Despair…the grief and mourning related to the deprivation of the mother or other attachment figure.
- Defense…the reaction to the privation or deprivation of the mother or other attachment figure.
Bowlby postulated that these 3 stages were interconnected as a single process. An infant who has lost or been deprived of their mother or other attachment figure will experience all three responses.
This includes the final stage of “defense” where their listlessness, increased detachment and minimal attachment (crying, smiling, etc) behaviors signal that they have “given up” looking for their mothers.
Or maybe we could say the infants/young children have given up their interest in connecting, relating and establishing the type of passionate relationships associated with joy and love.
Not a good thing and predicts difficulties later in life as adults forming healthy relationships.
Jun
25
2008
Ok, here is the connection. John Bowlby can be called the “father of modern attachment theory” and Ram Singh Munda can be called the “father of Rani , the sloth bear from India.”
Here is a picture of Rani and Ram. Apparantly, riding on the back of Ram’s bike is a favorite activity for Rani.

Well, there is more…
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Jun
25
2008
Ram Singh Munda found an abandoned sloth bear cub in the forest near his home in India. Fearing the cub would die left alone, he brought the cub home as a pet and companion for his young daughter.
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Apr
22
2008
In the video, Carolyn Jessop describes the abuse, torture and sexual abuse at the YFZ ranch as a type of pedophilia under the disguise of religion. Her description of the water torture is compelling. For more about Carolyn Jessop, click here.
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Mar
30
2008
One morning, neuroanatomist, Jill Bolte Taylor woke up and realized she was having a major stroke. It took her 6 months to recover. Here is a link to her
video presentation from
Ted.com.
Mar
19
2008
A recent study found that survivors of childhood trauma who had a certain genetic marker experienced more harmful effects during their lifetime. Check out the research.
Feb
08
2008
The chemistry that brings couples together, sex, partying, and idealistic views of the future do not last very long. I think this first stage of a relationship should be called “Euphoria.” So, dealing with the letdown of the euphoria fueled expectations is a crucial first step for couples wanting to make it long term.
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Jan
10
2008
Hillary just won the New Hampshire democratic primary. My daughter and I watched the telecast of her getting emotional when a warm-hearted woman asked her, “how are you doing?”…
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